SERIES: The Book of Romans
Liberty Limited by Love
Introduction: Let’s begin this morning by reading our Scripture text, Romans 14:13-23.
Therefore let us stop passing judgment on one another. Instead, make up your mind not to put any stumbling block or obstacle in your brother’s way. {14} As one who is in the Lord Jesus, I am fully convinced that no food is unclean in itself. But if anyone regards something as unclean, then for him it is unclean. {15} If your brother is distressed because of what you eat, you are no longer acting in love. Do not by your eating destroy your brother for whom Christ died. {16} Do not allow what you consider good to be spoken of as evil. {17} For the kingdom of God is not a matter of eating and drinking, but of righteousness, peace and joy in the Holy Spirit, {18} because anyone who serves Christ in this way is pleasing to God and approved by men.
{19} Let us therefore make every effort to do what leads to peace and to mutual edification. {20} Do not destroy the work of God for the sake of food. All food is clean, but it is wrong for a man to eat anything that causes someone else to stumble. {21} It is better not to eat meat or drink wine or to do anything else that will cause your brother to fall.
{22} So whatever you believe about these things keep between yourself and God. Blessed is the man who does not condemn himself by what he approves. {23} But the man who has doubts is condemned if he eats, because his eating is not from faith; and everything that does not come from faith is sin.
Much of the Bible is devoted to telling believers what is right and what is wrong, what they should do and what they must refrain from doing. But there are a lot of areas of behavior upon which the Bible does not touch directly. God has actually left a lot of things up to us, providing some general principles, a conscience, and the indwelling Holy Spirit to aid our decision-making.
Not surprisingly, different believers tend to arrive at different conclusions regarding these unspecified, debatable areas. Romans 14 was written to help us learn how to react appropriately to one another’s differing lifestyle choices. In this passage, as we saw last week, God is more concerned about our attitudes than our specific conduct. What God desires is not uniformity of opinion but unity of relationship.
So instead of trying to eliminate from the Body those who disagree with us, or separating ourselves into a church where everyone agrees on a long list of scruples, our task is to learn to live in peace with other believers without compromising our own basic convictions.
Last week we learned that there are three kinds of actions: things that are right, things that are wrong, and things that don’t matter. We also learned that there are two kinds of Christians relative to the category of things that don’t matter—there are “weak” believers and there are “strong” believers. “Weak” and “strong” here are used as technical terms to describe just this one area of life, and I have put them in italics in the outline when I am using them in the sense of Romans 14. Let me define the terms:
A “weak” brother or sister is the one who hasn’t grasped the full extent of his or her freedom in Christ and whose conscience is therefore bothered by many lifestyle choices that don’t really matter in the long run.
A “strong” brother or sister, on the other hand, is the one who can exercise his freedom in Christ with full peace of conscience.
On close examination, however, I think we find that a “weak” believer in this technical sense can be strong in the spiritual sense, while a “strong” believer in this technical sense can be weak in the spiritual sense. However, God’s ideal, I believe, is that we all be “strong” believers who are strong in the spiritual sense, and that’s where we will focus the bulk of our attention this morning.
By the way, if you were unable to be with us last Lord’s Day, I warned that this is a two-part sermon, and it is very important to hear both parts in order to get a balanced picture. Copies of last week’s message are available through the tape ministry upstairs, and I hope you will consider both sermons. Our first proposition this morning, then, is that …
A “weak” believer can be spiritually strong.
When he leaves judgment of the strong believer to the Lord. (4) It is a sign of enormous spiritual strength to have a conscience against a certain debatable action, to therefore rightly refrain from engaging in it oneself, and yet at the same time to refuse to criticize and judge a fellow believer who has a different opinion on the matter. It is a sign of spiritual strength, for example, for a total abstainer to respond graciously when offered a beer, “Thank you, but I think I’ll pass,” instead of “No thank you, I’m a Christian, I don’t drink.” As we saw last week in verse 3, God expressly forbids judgment of one another regarding things that don’t matter, i.e., things that are not intrinsically right or intrinsically wrong.
Second, a “weak” believer can be spiritually strong …
When he chooses his standards rationally rather than borrowing them from his culture (5b). Look at verse 5 again: “One man considers one day more sacred than another; another man considers every day alike. Each one should be fully convinced in his own mind.” I take it that means we are not to automatically adopt the convictions of our parents, or the convictions of our church, or the convictions of Billy Graham, or the convictions of our peers in youth group. We are to arrive at our own convictions regarding those issues God has not specifically addressed, after giving careful thought and prayerful consideration to all the principles taught in the Word of God.
Now let’s face it. There’s not a lot of rational thinking going on in this area, is there? If there were, why would some entire churches think alike regarding dancing or drinking or what version of the Bible to use? If everyone was fully convinced in his own mind, wouldn’t you expect somedisagreement?
Third, a “weak” believer can be spiritually strong …
When he refuses to violate his conscience, yet allows it to be educated by God’s Word. (1 Cor. 10:23ff) The conscience isn’t always right, but it’s always wrong to violate it. Let me repeat that: the conscience isn’t always right, but it’s always wrong to violate it. Look at verse 14: “As one who is in the Lord Jesus, I am fully convinced that no food is unclean in itself. But if anyone regards something as unclean, then for him it is unclean.” Glance down also at verses 22, 23: “So whatever you believe about these things keep between yourself and God. Blessed is the man who does not condemn himself by what He approves. But the man who has doubts is condemned if he eats, because his eating is not from faith; and everything that does not come from faith is sin.”
These verses tell us that even if one’s conscience tells him something is wrong when it really isn’twrong, he still shouldn’t do it. I believe the rationale behind this advice is that the conscience is a very delicate instrument, and repeated violation dulls its ability to warn us when we really need it. Better for it to warn us too often than not often enough.
However, my strong inclination is to believe that while God wants us to obey our consciences, he doesn’t want us to set our consciences in concrete regarding debatable things. After all, there are many indications in this text that the “weak” brother is really wrong in his viewpoints, though the error is not so serious that God wants the church to discipline or correct him. Apparently God has another way to bring the “weak” brother to the truth about his freedom. I suggest to you that the God-ordained way for one’s conscience to be educated is by the Holy Spirit working through the Word of God.
Now my purpose in this first point has simply been to establish that the “weak” believer is not necessarily a liability in the Body of Christ. He can make a significant contribution, even in leadership, if he leaves judgment of strong believers to the Lord, if he chooses his standards rationally, and if he allows his conscience to be educated by God’s Word.
I would like to establish for us this morning that …
A “strong” believer can be spiritually weak.
When he looks down on the “weak” believer. (3,10) Twice in our passage—in verse 3 and 10—the strong brother is forbidden to act contemptuously toward the “weak” believer. We looked in detail at why God forbids such behavior last Sunday, so I won’t elaborate any further this morning.
When he borrows his standards from his culture. (5b) Everything we said of the “weak” believer in this regard applies also to the “strong” believer. He has no business adopting the standards of society—even Christian society, but this happens all the time. In fact, I suggest to you that many who are masquerading as “strong” believers are simply succumbing to peer pressure and adopting standards that keep them from standing out as oddballs. They have not carefully and rationally thought through what lifestyle choices they should make, and therefore they are actually spiritually weak.
When his rights become his highest priority. (17,19) There’s a great tendency for all of us to emphasize our rights more than our obligations. That’s why Paul points out here in verse 17 that “the kingdom of God is not a matter of eating and drinking, but of righteousness, peace and joy in the Holy Spirit, because anyone who serves Christ in this way is pleasing to God and approved by men.” The strong brother must fight the natural inclination to defend his personal liberties at all costs, and instead think more about his freedom to act as Christ acted. I recall a situation in this church a number of years ago when a weak brother attacked a strong brother in a clear area of freedom. The violation of his rights angered that strong brother so much that he’s still angry about it years later. It has resulted in a terrible waste, as that strong brother has refused to use his spiritual gifts in the Body.
When he lacks discernment in the use of his freedom. (16) Verse 16 reads, “Do not allow what you consider good to be spoken of as evil.” Freedom is a good thing, but if it is not exercised with discernment and love, but rather is exercised indiscriminately, then there is danger that Christian freedom is going to earn a bad name. And that indeed has happened often in the church. I can think of a church in Houston, another one in Lincoln, Nebraska, and another in Kansas City, where freedom and grace have been preached and practiced so indiscriminately that many lives have been ruined and grace has actually earned a bad name.
When he tries to force the “weak” believer’s conscience. (15,20) A weak brother’s conscience can be forced intentionally or unintentionally. Either way, the responsibility for the result is assigned to the “strong” brother. Notice verse 15: “If your brother is distressed (I think the distress is to his conscience, for that is the context of the previous verse) because of what you eat, you are no longer acting in love.” It doesn’t say, “If you try purposely to distress his conscience,” but rather “if he is distressed ….”
Well, so far we have seen that a “weak” believer can be spiritually strong and that a “strong” believer can be spiritually weak. Which is better? Well, I would say without hesitation that a spiritually strong “weak” brother is better for the church than a spiritually weak “strong” brother. But God’s ideal actually lies in a different direction.
God’s ideal is a “strong” believer who is also spiritually strong.
What are the characteristics of a spiritually strong “strong brother?” I have listed four of them, the first two of which we have already covered sufficiently:
He accepts the “weak” believer and treats him with respect.
He gets his personal standards and convictions from the Word of God.
His highest priority is the profit and edification of the Church. (19; 15:1-2) Look at verse 19: “Let us therefore make every effort to do what leads to peace and to mutual edification.” Then turn over to chapter 15, the first two verses: “We who are strong ought to bear with the failings of the weak (and notice that Paul acknowledges that the “weak” brother’s views are sometimes “failings”) and not to please ourselves. Each of us should please his neighbor for his good, to build him up.” The profit and edification of fellow Christians should be our highest priority.
Fourth (and here we will concentrate the remainder of our time), …
He is willing to limit his freedom whenever one of several circumstances is present. Now once again I remind you that we are not even considering those actions which are clearly identified as “right” or “wrong” in the Scriptures. Such items are automatically outside the freedom category and the believer must simply say “yes” regarding the former and “no” regarding the latter. But even in regard to those things which don’t have a “thus saith the Lord” attached, there are times when the spiritually strong “strong” brother will nevertheless say “no.”
One of the occasions when the “strong” believer should be willing to limit his liberty is when a biblical principle is at stake in his lifestyle choice. For example, there is a biblical principle found in I Cor. 6:12: “Everything is permissible for me . . .” I believe that’s God’s stated position on dancing, drinking, chewing, and Sabbath observance. But the same verse goes on to say, “. . . but not everything is beneficial.”
To apply this, let’s take an action which is neither expressly approved nor forbidden in Scripture, but over which conservative Christians have sometimes differed, like attending the movies. Since movie attendance is not addressed in the Scriptures, I would assume most of us would put it in the category of things that are neither intrinsically right nor intrinsically wrong. A “weak” believer may conclude that he cannot attend the theater, while a “strong” believer will conclude that he can. But does that mean that the “strong” brother can legitimately go to all movies? No, because there are biblical principles—not specific commands—but principles which would rule out many movies today. They simply are not beneficial. For example,
Rom. 13:14: “Clothe yourselves with the Lord Jesus Christ, and do not think about how to gratify the desires of the sinful nature.”
1 Peter 2:11: “Abstain from fleshly lusts, which wage war against the soul.”
Phil. 4:8: “Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.” The “strong” believer who is also spiritually strong will limit his liberty to go to the movies when these biblical principles would be violated.
A second situation in which the spiritually strong “strong” believer will limit his freedom is when he cannot conscientiously thank God for his choice and glorify God by it. In 1 Cor. 10:30, a passage whose message is quite parallel to Rom. 14, the Apostle asks the question, “If I partake with thankfulness, why am I denounced because of something I thank God for?” It seems that the ability to give thanks to God is an important criterion for Paul in determining whether a debatable action is legitimate.
A related criterion is found in verse 31: “So, whatever you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God.” These two criteria are quite useful in deciding debatable things. Take movies again. Can you thank God for the privilege of seeing a movie and does it lead you to give praise to Him? Well, that depends on the movie, doesn’t it? I’m afraid not too many of them would pass that test, but there are a few that would. That was certainly my reaction after seeing Chariots of Fire.
Can you sit down with a can of beer in your hand and thank God because it tastes great and has 1/3 less calories? Many of our evangelical brothers and sisters in Germany and France drink beer regularly and have no problem giving God thanks for it. I understand it used to flow freely at ministerial association meetings of the very conservative and evangelical German Baptists here in the U.S. The question needs to be asked: Can I give God thanks, and can I glorify Him?
A third situation which may demand that the “strong” brother limit his liberty is when his choice has a strong likelihood of becoming habit-forming. I refer to 1 Cor. 6:12 once again: “Everything is permissible for me, but I will not be mastered by anything.” Gambling for recreation is a debatable issue that might be refrained from on this basis. As far as I can tell gambling isn’t expressly forbidden in Scripture. But there is certainly a grave danger for many people of becoming compulsive gamblers; in fact, the experts say that somewhere between 5 and 10% of all recreational gamblers will develop a severe addiction that, if left untreated, will destroy their lives. And friends, born-again believers are just as susceptible to this addiction as anyone else!
A fourth situation the “strong” brother must consider is whether his choice is physically harmful and thus might limit his service to the Lord or to his family. In 1 Cor. 6:19,20 the question is asked, “Do you not know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? Therefore, honor God with your body.” Smoking is an action which the Scriptures do not specifically address but which is clearly suspect on the basis of its inherent harmfulness. Doctors are now saying that every cigarette a person smokes will reduce his lifetime by at least one minute. That means a two-pack a day person cuts his life short by more than ten days for every year he smokes. How does that fit in with Moses’ instructions in Ps. 90 where he asked God to “teach us to number our days, that we may present unto Thee a heart of wisdom”?
Most of you will say to that, “Amen, preach it brother,” because smoking is no longer viewed as acceptable behavior in society at large. But what about fret and worry, which is expressly forbidden in Scripture, but which a lot of us treat as in the category of “things that don’t matter”? Fret and worry can cut one’s life short even faster than smoking. The tragedy is that many smokers are also fretters and worriers, so they shortchange themselves twice.
A fifth situation that should cause a “strong” believer to limit his liberty is when his choice is obnoxious to others and thereby hinders his testimony. In 1 Cor. 10:23-24 we find this instruction: “Everything is permissible, but not everything is constructive. Nobody should seek his own good, but the good of others.” Let me take an example here that probably involves very few in my audience—chewing tobacco. As far as I know it’s not quite as harmful to one’s general health as smoking, though mouth and throat cancer are certainly at increased risk. But chewing tobacco is an obnoxious habit. It turns one’s teeth yellow. It does wonders for one’s breath. And, oh the spitting! I think it would be quite ineffective to share with someone the joys of the Christian life if one had to turn and spit every few minutes while sharing his faith.
A sixth situation that “strong” believer must consider is whether the authority he is under restricts his choice. What if you’re a 15-year-old kid and you happen to be a “strong” believer (or at least you think you are), but your parents are “weak” Christians when it comes to the category of “things that don’t matter.” What if you feel freedom of conscience to drink or go to a prom, but your parents don’t share your views? Then the principle of Eph. 6:1 takes precedent: “Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right.”
Now parents can handle a situation like this well or they can handle it poorly. If you want to read a beautiful story of how one parent explained his conservative lifestyle choices for his family to his child in such a way that the child learned to respect the parent rather than rebel, I urge you to read a chapter in Garry Friesen’s book, Decision Making and the Will of God, pp. 389-398.
This sixth principle would also apply to membership in a local church or other Christian group. Some lady, I don’t even remember who it was, mentioned last Sunday that women who teach leaders and discussion leaders in BSF all have to wear dresses. She thought that should be an area of freedom, but BSF thinks differently. Her attitude, however, was not resentful. Essentially she said, “This is an important ministry God has given me. Wearing a dress is a small price to pay.” Sometimes the authority one is under restricts one’s choices.
Finally, a “strong” believer who is spiritually strong will limit his liberty if his choice has a strong likelihood of causing a “weak” believer to stumble. Now this may be the most important truth of today’s text. Over and over again in the last half of Romans 14, particularly verses 13-23, as well as in several related texts, we are warned against allowing our freedom to interfere with another believer’s spiritual growth. You’ve heard it said that “your freedom ends where my nose begins.” In a sense that is what Paul is saying, only it’s not noses he’s interested in—it’s spiritual growth.
One of the best ways to grasp the seriousness of this danger of causing a “weak” brother to stumble is to analyze the stark words Paul uses to describe it:
v. 13: put a stumbling block or an obstacle in a brother’s way
v. 15: destroy your brother for whom Christ died
v. 21: cause your brother to fall
In 1 Cor. 8:11 the seriousness is highlighted even further as Paul suggests: “So this weak brother, for whom Christ died, is destroyed by your knowledge. When you sin against your brothers in this way and wound their weak conscience, you sin against Christ.” This shows that it is possible that just by exercising our freedom to do something concerning which God has specified no prohibition, and concerning which our conscience is clear, we could end up sinning against Christ.
Such an awful possibility makes it imperative for us to have clear in our minds what it means to cause a “weak” brother to stumble. I have borrowed a definition of a stumbling block, and I want you to listen carefully: A stumbling block is an action taken by a stronger brother which, though it would ordinarily qualify as a permissible act of freedom, influences a weaker brother to sin against his conscience.”[i]
You say, “Give me an example. It’s too theoretical. I need a practical illustration.” OK, let’s take the one Paul uses in 1 Cor. 8—it has to do with whether a first-century Christian had the freedom to go to pot-luck dinners at the local pagan temple. Well, says Paul, technically yes. After all, the idols in that temple are just wood and stone. But then he adds in verse 7:
… not everyone knows this. Some people are still so accustomed to idols that when they eat such food, they think of it as having been sacrificed to an idol, and since their conscience is weak, it is defiled …. For if anyone with a weak conscience sees you who have this knowledge eating in an idol’s temple, won’t he be emboldened to eat what has been sacrificed to idols?
You say, so what? If there’s nothing wrong with it in the first place, then what difference does it make whether the weak brother is influenced to do it? Well, it goes back to the problem of conscience. As long as his conscience tells him it’s wrong, then it’s wrong for him. We should never be a party to influencing anyone to violate his or her conscience.
To bring this matter up to date, I think we have a tremendous warning here against the kind of peer pressure that is common in our day, especially among teenagers. Young people, if you influence some friend of yours to violate his or her conscience in regard to dating standards, drinking, dancing, or anything else, God is going to hold you accountable, not just for your own behavior but also for any harm that comes to your friend through that behavior. How desperately we need young people who are willing to seek the highest standards rather than the lowest they think they can get by with. A lot of parents may also be answerable to God for wrongly influencing their children’s consciences in regard to some of these things.
But these principles also apply to those outside our homes—to fellow-members of the Body of Christ. We must purposely avoid causing our brothers and sisters in Christ to stumble. The burden is put on the shoulder of the “strong” believer to look out for the “weak” believer, not the other way around.
A natural objection generally arises in our minds at this point: “If I have to watch all my p’s and q’s to make sure I don’t offend any believer who disagrees with me about things that don’t matter, I might as well become a hermit, for in a large church there would probably be some believer who would take a negative view of virtually any freedom I might exercise.”
That’s a very legitimate question, and I would like to respond to it by distinguishing between a genuine “weak” believer and a Pharisee. There are a lot of Pharisees in the church who disguise themselves as “weak” believers, and the NT never challenges us to adjust our behavior to suit the Pharisee—Jesus certainly didn’t. A Pharisee might be defined as “a professing believer with strong conviction, who, because of his own pride, takes offense at those who resist his pressure to conform to his point of view.” The Pharisee is full of spiritual pride. He’s not trying to grow in his spiritual walk; rather he believes he has arrived, and he spends his time taking potshots at other Christians. When you violate his lifestyle choices you aren’t influencing his conscience—you’re just hurting his pride. His goal is to control the lifestyles of other Christians.
On the other hand, the genuine “weak” believer is humbly trying to grow and make progress in his spiritual life. So I don’t want to do anything that might hinder that growth. Friesen and Paxson have suggested that most genuinely “weak” believers fit into one of the following four categories:[ii]
1. A relatively recent convert who may have come from a particularly immoral background. Often such babes in Christ immediately reject virtually every aspect of their former lifestyle, including some practices that may be very well within the believer’s sphere of freedom.
2. A young adult who is in the process of leaving the parental nest. His conscience is tender, and he merits special sensitivity.
3. A believer from another country or culture. Whether we like it or not, culture plays a large part in our choices regarding “things that don’t matter.” Believers in Europe, where drinking is generally viewed as a legitimate freedom, should be careful regarding the use of alcohol with regard to the conscience of a young American Christian visiting in their midst.
4. Dependent children of “weaker” brothers and sisters in the Church. This is a serious warning to all those who work with our children and youth. We must be careful to realize that some “weaker” believers have entrusted their children to our care, and if they see their personal standards being frequently violated by their teachers or youth leaders, the result can be unnecessary tension in those children’s lives and in their homes.
These four categories of “weak” believers deserve our careful consideration. We must cater to their consciences. Paul himself once said, “If meat offends my brother, I won’t eat any as long as the world stands.” There’s no evidence he ever became a vegetarian, but he was willing to become one, if necessary.
Conclusion: If there is one statement above all others from Romans 14 that we need to take with us and keep before us, it is verse 17: “For the kingdom of God is not a matter of eating and drinking, but of righteousness, peace and joy in the Holy Spirit, because anyone who serves Christ in this way is pleasing to God and approved by men.”
That, by the way, is an important principle for the unbeliever to consider as well. Jesus asked, “What shall it profit a man if he gains the whole world but loses his own soul?” You may love your freedom to do your own thing and be accountable to no one. You may hold up Frank Sinatra as your idol because he did it his way, but Jesus said, “If the Son therefore shall make you free, you shall be free indeed.” He died to free you from yourself and from your slavery to sin, and his gift of salvation can free you up to serve others.
DATE: December 10, 1995
Tags:
Love
Liberty
Weak Christians
Strong Christians
Conscience
Stumbling block
[i] Garry Friesen and Robin Paxson, Decision Making and the Will of God, A Biblical Alternative to the Traditional View, 407.
[ii] Friesen and Paxson, 415-416.