SERIES: Christ Is the Answer When the Church Is in Crisis
Epitaph of a man of God: “He fled.”
SCRIPTURE: 1 Cor. 6:18, Genesis 39
Introduction:
I groped sleepily for the phone, wondering why the hospital would be calling my husband Bob back to work when he had just returned at midnight from a 36-hour shift. “Aunt Ann,” my teen-age niece sobbed hysterically into the phone, “tell Uncle Bob to come right now. Daddy has hung himself–and I can’t get him down.”
“Oh, no! Hold on, honey–he’ll be there in five minutes.”
Bob raced to the car. As I waited with our sleeping children, my mind was a jumble of despair, unbelief, guilt, sorrow. I prayed over and over, “Lord, let him get there in time.” Yet I knew that it would be medically impossible to save Lee’s life.… I prayed. I cried. I thought of my nieces and nephew, and their shocking discovery. And I wondered where my sister Shirley was when her husband took his life.
I knew why Lee hanged himself, but it was incomprehensible to me that he would do it. I loved him deeply. He was like a father to me–a sensitive mature man, solid and strong. He had married my sister when she was very young; all his life seemed to be wrapped up in her. He adored her. Then as an older man, he was crushed by her rejection and her romantic affair with a younger man. No other love in his life was strong enough to make him go on living.
“Lee, why didn’t you come to us? How could you do it? How could Shirley be unfaithful, knowing how you loved her? How could she be so unconcerned for you?” These questions kept my mind in turmoil for weeks, as I prayed for the ability to forgive my sister for her unacknowledged failure.[i]
That is a true story. What led up to this tragedy? What powerful temptation overcame Shirley? What happened to her moral convictions? And where was God in all this?
As human beings we face powerful temptations. Our inability or unwillingness to resist brings about untold heartache and untold ruin of lives. No one in this room would ever want to get a call like that in the night. But how do we resist these daily temptations? How do we flee sexual immorality, as 1 Cor. 6:18 commands us to do?
I preached last Lord’s Day a message entitled, “Six Reasons Why Sex Outside Marriage Is Wrong,” from 1 Cor. 6. You listened with great attention to God’s Word, and I have been very encouraged by the number of you, including teens, who said in one way or another, “Thank you for being honest and bold to speak the truth.” As I worked on that message, however, I was well aware that it focused on logical and theological reasons to flee from sexual immorality. Paul was committed to leaving no excuses or rationalizations open to his readers. He covered every base and left the promiscuous without a leg to stand on.
But probably none of us operates consistently on a strictly intellectual level. Particularly is that true when it comes to our love lives. Hormones and emotions often rule the day, and the lofty logic given to us in 1 Corinthians 6 can seem pretty irrelevant in a moment of intense passion, though it certainly is not. That is why the stories of Scripture are so important. They fill in the gap between emotions and logic. They show us real flesh-and-blood individuals who struggled with the same temptations we experience and either found victory or, in some cases, crashed and burned.
The Bible gives us a wonderful example of someone who found victory by fleeing when temptation was overwhelming. Please listen to the story of Joseph as found in Genesis 39. I’m not going to put the Scripture on the screen this morning, because I just want you to listen as I read from the New Living Translation.
Now when Joseph arrived in Egypt with the Ishmaelite traders, he was purchased by Potiphar, a member of the personal staff of Pharaoh, the king of Egypt. Potiphar was the captain of the palace guard.
The Lord was with Joseph and blessed him greatly as he served in the home of his Egyptian master. Potiphar noticed this and realized that the Lord was with Joseph, giving him success in everything he did. So Joseph naturally became quite a favorite with him. Potiphar soon put Joseph in charge of his entire household and entrusted him with all his business dealings. From the day Joseph was put in charge, the Lord began to bless Potiphar for Joseph’s sake. All his household affairs began to run smoothly, and his crops and livestock flourished. So Potiphar gave Joseph complete administrative responsibility over everything he owned. With Joseph there, he didn’t have a worry in the world, except to decide what he wanted to eat!
Now Joseph was a very handsome and well-built young man. And about this time, Potiphar’s wife began to desire him and invited him to sleep with her. But Joseph refused. “Look,” he told her, “my master trusts me with everything in his entire household. No one here has more authority than I do! He has held back nothing from me except you, because you are his wife. How could I ever do such a wicked thing? It would be a great sin against God.”
She kept putting pressure on him day after day, but he refused to sleep with her, and he kept out of her way as much as possible. One day, however, no one else was around when he was doing his work inside the house. She came and grabbed him by his shirt, demanding, “Sleep with me!” Joseph tore himself away, but as he did, his shirt came off. She was left holding it as he ran from the house.
When she saw that she had his shirt and that he had fled, she began screaming. Soon all the men around the place came running. “My husband has brought this Hebrew slave here to insult us!” she sobbed. “He tried to rape me, but I screamed. When he heard my loud cries, he ran and left his shirt behind with me.”
She kept the shirt with her, and when her husband came home that night, she told him her story. “That Hebrew slave you’ve had around here tried to make a fool of me,” she said. “I was saved only by my screams. He ran out, leaving his shirt behind!”
After hearing his wife’s story, Potiphar was furious! He took Joseph and threw him into the prison where the king’s prisoners were held. But the Lord was with Joseph there, too, and he granted Joseph favor with the chief jailer. Before long, the jailer put Joseph in charge of all the other prisoners and over everything that happened in the prison. The chief jailer had no more worries after that, because Joseph took care of everything. The Lord was with him, making everything run smoothly and successfully. (Genesis 39)
I want us to consider four facts about Joseph’s life revealed in this passage, because in these I think we will find Joseph’s secret to success:
His past was a problem.
His temptation was powerful.
His convictions were passionate.
His future was promising.
What I want you to see is that these are not four unrelated facts –they all fit together. Joseph’s problematic past was in part what made the temptation powerful, but because he was passionate about his convictions, his future was still promising.
Joseph’s past was a problem.
May I ask you a personal question? “How many of you here this morning would say you grew up in a dysfunctional family?” Teens, please don’t raise your hands if you’re sitting with your parents. The reason I ask that question is that I want you to see how widespread the problem is. The problem is huge, but what are we going to do with that fact? The victim culture in which we live constantly encourages us to deflect responsibility for our behavior due to the inadequacies of our home environment. The thinking, often subconscious, goes like this: “Sure, a person from a normal family and normal circumstances has no excuse for drug addiction, rage, sexual promiscuity, fathering illegitimate children, etc., but I grew up in a dysfunctional family, so what do you expect?”
I’m here to tell you most of us don’t have a clue as to what a dysfunctional family is until we meet Joseph’s family, yet he refused to use it as an excuse. About 18 centuries before Christ, Joseph was born into a superficially religious family, but not a godly one. His father Jacob was a con artist and most of his wealth was gained through deception. Jacob married twice but also had sex with both of his wives’ servant-girls, with the result that Joseph’s twelve siblings had four different mothers. Talk about blended family issues!
Plus, Joseph’s ten older brothers were not exactly good role models. One of them, Reuben, had sex with one of his stepmothers. Another brother, Judah, produced a child by his own daughter-in-law. Two of his brothers took revenge upon a whole tribe of men because one of them had taken advantage of their only sister. They tricked the men into being circumcised and then slaughtered them when they were too sore to defend themselves. But the worst reality was that his “wonderful brothers” sold him into slavery to a foreign country because he was “daddy’s favorite!”
I tell you all this, not to shock you or to cause you to feel sorry for Joseph, but rather to drive home the next point:
Joseph’s temptation was powerful.
With his problematic past, Joseph had every worldly reason and rationalization to yield to the advances of Potiphar’s wife. After all, look at the moral examples of his father and his older brothers. Consider the vulnerability, to say nothing of the anger, he must have experienced at being separated from his family (for at least ten years by the time our story unfolds). And think about the related excuses that could well have entered Joseph’s mind:
1. God allowed me to be sold into slavery. What do I owe Him?
2. No one seems to have cared about me my whole life. Now here is a woman who wants me.
3. Sexual immorality is the order of the day here in Egypt. Everybody’s doing it.
4. I didn’t go looking for trouble. She came on to me.
5. I’ve worked hard and my boss is giving me more and more responsibility. This is just one of the perks of my job!
6. God made me good looking, sexy, and irresistible. Why deprive Mrs. Potiphar of God’s gift to women!
7. I’m just meeting her needs! After all, her husband is a eunuch, for Pete’s sake! (Which was probably true, since most of the king’s close associates were eunuchs, so they would be no threat to the king’s harem).
8. And perhaps most convincing, No one will ever know!
Joseph faced a powerful temptation. This man was no embalmed mummy down in Egypt. He was no plaster‑of‑Paris saint without red blood cells in his veins. He was a successful, good-looking, bright, and charming young man who had no family to protect him and no mentors to keep him on the straight and narrow.
Notice something else that made this temptation exceptionally powerful: it came in dual form, both persistent and sudden. Some of us can handle sudden temptations well, but the persistent ones wear us down. Joseph experienced both. Look at verse 10: “She spoke to Joseph day after day.” That’s persistent temptation. But in v. 11 it says, “One day he went into the house to attend to his duties, and none of the household servants was inside. She caught him by his cloak and said, ‘Come to bed with me!’” That’s sudden temptation, the kind that comes on like a flood or a tidal wave.
Friends, you know something? While temptation can come on suddenly, there are almost always warning signs if we’re looking for them. Charles Mylander describes a fairly typical beginning for sexual sin:
“An unwary Christian often becomes vulnerable because the tender talk with his or her spouse is missing…. It may start with a sexual problem they no longer talk about. The finances pose trouble, and the only communication is a fight…. Then, one of them begins confiding in an employee or neighbor of the opposite sex. This person, perhaps divorced or hurting in his or her own marriage, listens intently and seems to care.
Nothing in the conversation seems to hint of any immoral activity. Each feels it’s innocent, harmless, and even helpful to the other. Tender talk about real feelings, and often about marriage problems, is going on outside of marriage and not within it. The light turns amber.
Before long, “innocent” touching begins taking place. If she is his secretary, he puts a hand on her shoulder while giving instructions. If she is a friend, there’s a social embrace, a warm pat, a friendly nudge. Both would insist nothing is wrong with the limited physical contact between them because it’s not related to sex. They are good friends and no more, or so they tell themselves. Each, however, is aware of the other’s genuine admiration and acceptance. The light is changing from amber to red.
During this stage, the couple begins spending more time together. At first, they just happen to work on the same projects, or they end up at the same events. It feels good to be together. But before long, the two are making excuses to spend more time with each other. Lunch or dinner, special gifts, and ‘hidden’ times with each other soon become the norm. By now both know they have much more than a casual friendship. But they rationalize that it’s not adultery because, after all, they are not sleeping together. A solid red light is glowing.
Once emotional delight with the opposite sex is coming from outside the marriage, the danger is intense. The man suddenly realizes he is in love with this other woman, although he tells himself he also cares for his wife. The woman knows she is in love with this other man and often feels she’s made a mistake about the man she did marry. By this time, the two who are bound emotionally become one in the flesh. No more warning lights–it’s too late to flee.” [ii]
If you’ve been playing with fire, toying with sexual sin, fantasizing about what you used to consider unthinkable, now is the time to heed the warning lights on the dashboard of your mind. If you’re working with someone you suspect is flirting with you, you must plan ahead to avoid ever being alone with that person. And if it can’t be avoided, better to quit and get another job. Joseph, as a slave, probably didn’t have that option, but it would be better to lose a good job than to compromise your personal integrity.
Well, Joseph’s past was clearly a problem, and that made the temptation even more powerful. What was Joseph’s secret?
Joseph’s convictions were passionate.
The key to his refusal to yield can be found in four truths mentioned in the text: He had a proper view of sin, a proper view of God, a proper view of others, and a proper view of himself.
He had a proper view of sin. In v. 9 Joseph asks Potiphar’s wife, “How could I do such a wicked thing?” Joseph calls it what it is–not a romantic interlude, not an affair, not making love, but “a wicked thing.” A lot of evil things are being marketed successfully today by calling them something other than what they are. I’ve mentioned before that Orange Roughy, one of the most popular seafood delicacies on the market, only became marketable when they changed its name from “Slimehead.” “Sauteed Slimehead” just didn’t look too appetizing on a restaurant menu. Well, that’s an amoral example of the difference a name makes, but there are plenty of immoral things that have become acceptable by calling them something other than what they are.
Abortion seems a lot more acceptable to some when it is referred to as “a woman’s right to choose.” A baby’s death is somehow less horrendous when the child is called a fetus or even a POC (product of conception). Pedophilia, one of the most destructive behaviors known to man, was recently reclassified from a sickness to “an alternative lifestyle” by the American Psychological Association, and as a result, we will undoubtedly be hearing public debates about the “civil rights” of pedophiles.[iii] Racial segregation is more acceptable when it’s called zoning. On and on we could go. Joseph called sin “sin.”
He had a proper view of God. Joseph continued, “How then could I do such a wicked thing and sin against God?” All sin is first and foremost sin against God. A dramatist has told the story of Joseph’s temptation, and in one particularly profound scene he shows Potiphar’s wife preparing her bedroom and herself for the seduction. She places a robe over the head of her Egyptian god and says to Joseph, “He will not see.” “But,” says Joseph, “my God always sees.” She would never have done what she wanted to do in front of her husband, but she had no fear of her gods. Joseph feared his God.
John Wesley, one of the great preachers in the history of England and later America, once prayed, “God, give me 100 men who hate nothing but sin and fear no one but God, and I will take England for the Gospel.” Joseph reminds me of the kind of guy Wesley prayed for. He hated nothing but sin and feared no one but God. May his tribe increase.
He had a proper view of others. Look at verses 8 & 9 of chapter 39. Joseph protests to Potiphar’s wife, “With me in charge, my master does not concern himself with anything in the house; everything he owns he has entrusted to my care. No one is greater in this house than I am. My master has withheld nothing from me except you, because you are his wife.” Joseph knew the meaning of loyalty. Someone has said that adultery is of the devil, if for no other reason, because it is the betrayal of an oath and the breach of a trust. More of us need to consider the awful violation of duty and trust that is involved in sexual sin (even by the unmarried, I might add, for they are defrauding their future spouse).
He had a proper view of himself. Joseph knew his limitations, for v. 12 says that when she caught him by the garment saying, “Come to bed with me,” he left his garment in her hand and ranoutside. Not a very courageous response to temptation, is it? But smart! Joseph would rather be holy than be a hero. He valued a good shirt less than a good conscience. In fact, he valued everything less than a clear conscience.
I fear that many Christians today, if caught in Potiphar’s home with Potiphar’s wife and the identical set of circumstances would have had a far different reaction than Joseph. With no intention to go all the way with her, of course, many would have seen this as a good opportunity to flirt a little, check out the scenery, store up a few fantasies for future use. But that’s the very reason why Joseph escaped unscathed morally, while many today are watching their families crumble right before their eyes.
I wish I could tell you that Joseph’s stand was immediately rewarded with blessing, but it didn’t quite work out that way. You’ve heard it said that “Heav’n has no rage like love to hatred turned, nor hell a fury like a woman scorned!”[iv] Potiphar’s wife unleashed her fury on Joseph. Prison was an awful price to pay for integrity, and Egyptian prisons were no picnic. Psalm 105:18 speaks of Joseph when it says, “They bruised his feet with shackles, his neck was put in irons.”
A high price? Yes, but for purity? Not too high. The Psalmist wrote, “I’d rather be a doorkeeper in the House of my God than to dwell in the tents of wickedness.” But God didn’t leave Joseph there to rot in prison. Test him? Yes. Abandon him? No. In the last three verses of the chapter we begin to see that despite all the mistreatment Joseph experienced, his future was promising.
Joseph’s future was promising.
It was promising precisely because he was a man of integrity, and he was a man of integrity because he knew God was with him, even in a stinking dungeon.
Though thrown into prison, God gave him success. In verse 20 we read, “But while Joseph was there in the prison, the Lord was with him; he showed him kindness and granted him favor in the eyes of the prison warden. So the warden put Joseph in charge of all those held in the prison, and he was made responsible for all that was done there. The warden paid no attention to anything under Joseph’s care, because the Lord was with Joseph and gave him success in whatever he did.”
Though forgotten by others, God remembered him. In the next chapter we have a fascinating story about two officials of Pharaoh’s court who were also banished to the prison where Joseph was doing time. Joseph helped the king’s cupbearer by interpreting a dream for him as meaning that he would get out of prison in three days. Then he said to the cupbearer, “When all goes well with you, remember me and show me kindness; mention me to Pharaoh and get me out of this prison. For I was forcibly carried off from the land of the Hebrews, and even here I have done nothing to deserve being put in a dungeon.” Well, the cupbearer was indeed freed in three days and restored to his position, but the last verse of the chapter says he did not remember Joseph; he forgot him.
But God did not forget. After two more years passed God allowed Joseph to interpret a dream by Pharaoh himself, and as a result he was released from prison. And not just released!
Though a Jewish foreigner, God installed him as Prime Minister of Egypt. Look at 41:39:
“Since God has made all this known to you, there is no one so discerning and wise as you. You shall be in charge of my palace, and all my people are to submit to your orders. Only with respect to the throne will I be greater than you.” So Pharaoh said to Joseph, “I hereby put you in charge of the whole land of Egypt.” Then Pharaoh took his signet ring from his finger and put it on Joseph’s finger. He dressed him in robes of fine linen and put a gold chain around his neck. He had him ride in a chariot as his second-in-command, and men shouted before him, “Make way!”
What an amazing turnabout for this falsely convicted Hebrew slave! Which brings us to the final point:
Though sold into slavery by his own brothers, God made him the deliverer of his people. Joseph spared them from famine and got Pharaoh to give them the fertile Nile delta to live in. From slave to savior! Incredible, but not unusual for God.
Have you noticed that three times in this chapter the phrase is found, “And God was with Joseph.” Often we are mad at God or blame Him for our circumstances, and we use that as an excuse to sin. But God was with Joseph (and He is with us) in good times and bad, even at times when tempted. Perhaps that was Joseph’s secret–God was real to him and he practiced the presence of God all the time. He learned to depend upon God, not trying to overcome temptation in his own effort (which will always fail eventually) but relying on the power of His Spirit.
Conclusion: Could it be that someone listening to me right now is facing Joseph’s temptation or one just as bad? I think it is not only likely, but almost certain. Please don’t dally with it. The person who plays with temptation fire will inevitably get burned.
How will you face the temptations you meet this week? Will you excuse yourself because of your troubled past or will you instead purpose to be extra cautious because you know your past makes you vulnerable?
Will you succumb to the power of temptation by using excuses? Like,…
What do I owe God after all the ways He has let me down?
No one loves me, values me, or accepts me, so I have to find love wherever I can.”
Everybody’s doing it.
I wasn’t looking for trouble–it just came to me.
I deserve to be happy.
I am God’s gift to the opposite sex.
I’m just meeting his/her needs.
No one will ever know!
What convictions do you have now that will serve you well when you are tempted or when you find yourself in the heat of passion? Do you have a proper view of sin? Of God? Of others? Of yourself? Are you committed to flee temptation?
As you face your future today, are you confident that whatever happens, your God will be with you? Are you relying on the power of His Spirit who is in you to help you overcome temptation, rather than relying on your own strength?
Let’s bow our heads and our hearts in prayer. “Lord, our hearts are deceitful above all things and desperately wicked. Forgive us for our divided loyalties. Protect us so that your Spirit can live in us with power and great glory. Father, please guard our hearts. In Jesus’ name, amen.”
DATE: February 4, 2001
Tags:
Temptation
Excuses
Dysfunctional families
[i]. “The Subtlety of Sexual Sin,” anonymous article in Eternity, February 1977, 27.
[ii]. Charles Mylander, Winning the Battle Within.
[iii] Note added in 2023: In recent months, pedophiles have been called “minor attracted persons,” a truly Orwellian attempt to downplay the seriousness of the deviancy.
[iv] William Congreve, Irish Literature, Vol. 2 & 2, 615.